Subject: Re: Chaste Masterbator (DT69's Licker) Message to Fandom From: Infinity@world.std.com (Captain Infinity) Newsgroups: alt.fan.tom-servo,rec.arts.sf.tv Date: Sun, 14 Feb 1999 Message-ID: <36cafe95.12184861@news-f.std.com> In article <36C618D7.58766247@erols.com> Reverend Sean O'Hara wrote *some* of these things: >From Chaste Masterbator (Deep Throat Sixty-nine's "Licker"): > >I would like to thank all the fans on the internet who have attempted suicide while watching ST:DT69 but failed because of an overwhelming urge >to get into my pants by posting inane messages to half of usenet. Usenet suicide statistics plummet during the new episode season. >Unfortunately, due to the failure of everything I've attempted outside in the rain when naked except for the Vulcan ears I stole from the set >of Star Trek: Deep Throat Sixty-nine, I cannot afford to fly around the world in a hot-air balloon. Nevertheless, I plan to walk across the >country personally "thanking" each individual fan. Sorry, not even you can stop me; my mind is made up. Made up of green cheese sent to me by >Alan. If you could afford to fly into LA, I might make arrangements, to have you visit my dungeon. I'll whip your tight buns. You can run >but you better be fast. Once DT69 is off the air, I won't even be able to take on any new slaves; my harem is full. They all have to beable >to afford the condoms. > >Don't worry. I shall find some other avenue for my career advancement, perhaps the corner of 8th and Main will be open. I need to do something >other than continual appearances at Trek Cons as "That Cute Chick Who Offers Three Entrances, No Waiting." I once was called "The Slut That >Married the Guy With Funky Ears But Wasn't as Good as Quark". For all the good *that* did me; no business at all. Recently I've given Cyber to >my fans on the internet, I shall make sure Alan continues to keep you typing with one hand while I take a quick potty break. I keep him well >informed of everything I do. I promise that I won't take a bowel trophy from your shelf. Or is that "bowling"?. I can make a secretive >movement without you all finding out about. > >There are a few companies interested in my talents. If all my fans would donate $20 each, I'm sure I could bribe them easily. If all you do is >just write, showing that I already have a sizable fan base, I would be unable to do anything; you need to SEND CASH! I promise, my lips will be >most grateful. The address is: > > Boogie Knight Productions > 10666 Petty Ave. > Modesto California, 90211 If you want to visit in person, be sure to bring large bills; hundreds. >I would love that a lot. Thanks in advance. > > ---Chaste--- > > > > ************************* > ************************* > *** *** > *** END *** > *** *** > ************************* > ************************* > > > >-- >Reverend Sean O'Hara >You two can be an ordained minister: http://ulc.org/ulc >"Love is diseased." Euripides "Medea" ** Captain Infinity
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