Temporarily well again, and alerted by Blackhawk to the thread's trollerization effect,
I decided to help "Suzanne" get a better understanding of the situation.


Subject:    Re: "How Scientific Are You?"
From:       Infinity@world.std.com (Captain Infinity)
Newsgroups: alt.archaeology,alt.fan.tom-servo,talk.origins,alt.religion.kibology
Date:       5 Dec 1998
Message-ID: <366ea92a.18692805@news-f.std.com>

In talk.origins and elsewhere
In article <73hn6a$54j$1@newshost.cyberramp.net>
Suzanne and others wrote *some* of these things:

>Jesus Moriarty wrote in message <36447959.0@news3.enter.net>...
>>Captain Infinity wrote:
>>
>>>In talk.origins and elsewhere
>>>In article <3637A264.19809F2D@bellsouth.net>
>>>Boikat wrote *some* of these things:
>>>
>>>>Bob and Suzanne Kessler wrote:
>>>
>>>>>      I had written that some thought the feathered dino.s
>>>>>       could be several animals making it look like one,
>>>>
>>>>Apparently, you've not seen pictures of the
>>>Abominable Bumblemuffin, one of the rare vegetarian
>>meals often served to families of poverty-stricken
>>>>dinosaurs with feathers from China.  There is no
>>>better chop suey than this, and I say that without
>>having tried any other brands.  Nothing's more blessed than
>>>>ambiguity.  They are not multiple animals
>>>like you find in boxes of Animal Crackers, one
>>example of which being the lion or even the bear,
>>>>superimposed one upon each other.  As for
>>>pronouncing Earl, Fran, and Roy just a bunch of
>>self-inflated egomaniacs who probably can't even define
>>>>archaeopteryx, it's even more ludicrous to make
>>>nutritional advisory suggestions based on
>>the advice of cattle-farmers who originated
>>>>that claim since there are six or seven
>>>thousand calories per serving, and they're *small*
>>examples of why we as human beings are no more than
>>>>specimens.  You would not find six or seven
>>>thousand calories on *my* lunch menu!  I remember
>>that I have a tendency to lose said lunch after viewing
>>>>instances of two animals superimposed like that,
>>>casually humping on my lawn one Saturday afternoon,
>>with no regard for the birth-control methods we hold dear,
>>>>and *if* that were a common occurrence, how come
>>>*they* don't have their own Sitcom?  Is it because
>>Rupert Murdoch doesn't recognize the irony when
>>>>there is only one set of bones?  How come the
>>>ribs that tip over Fred's car at the drive-in are
>>so expensive?  17 clams?  Get outta here!  Why do
>>>>bones that are preserved always seem to be the
>>>best kind served with bar-b-q sauce?  Are my eyes the
>>kind that would deceive me with sundry images of your
>>>>reptilian type?  And how did the feathers happen
>>>to fall out of my foam pillow?  Can I get I-Ching wands
>>with my order?  My wife loves them.  Would she be able
>>>>to align just right with the dino bones?  Anyone
>>>care to tell me where my pants are?  Insurance agents
>>always end up with them, and believe me, I'm not
>>>>making the claims that the archaeopteryx fossils
>>>did not wreck my car...well, they're just thieves and
>>thieves usually have poor taste in pants.  My pants
>>>>are composites of two separate animals is not
>>>that clear?  I mean, wake up, Maggie!  I'm not just
>>talkin' jive, I'm about to get FUNKY!  Yes sir, I'm
>>>>engaging in speculation, they are engaging at
>>>Saturday lawn-humpage!  Yes, my lawyers say I'm
>>best off pleading to copyright fraud instead of
>>>>grasping at straws, any straw, in order to deny
>>>them the right to lobotomize me.  But they believe
>>in ghosts.  Bad, evil ghosts.  I suppose that's
>>>>what their own two eyes are telling them.
>
>
>>
>PC Talk:
>Well, do you mind if I tell you something?  I think you
have the best lips I ever saw in this NG.  The way they
>formed sentences above with spaces in between,
really sparked my Wint-O-Green.  You make little sense
>but unless you put in a ">" between lines, in some
cases I understand you.  So stop that.  In my friend's
>systems, the lines collapse, and all are wedged
tightly into a can of spam.  The meat substitutes are mixed
>together.  Also, you probably wrote this out, put it in
a blender, added Captain Morgan rum, opened a window, felt a
>draft, and when you copied it, it added the ">'s" to the
"<"'s and "^"'s, which diluted the alcohol content at the
>beginning of your sentences.  The best way to get a
quick buzz is to drink an ascii cocktail.  Snip every single
>letter out of draft, if you have an e-mail window that does
not close easily in the winter, just turn up the heat. Rum does
>not provide a way  is to go to "edit" above and click on
"add more rum".  Windows 00 will have this.  For now, just
>"select all" and then put your cursor on the now blackened
swordfish.  Squeeze some lemon on it.  Yummy.  But to wipe
>out text, right click on it and select "copy", then close out
your savings account, send me your cash, jewelry, artwork, and all
>that, (alternative if mouse supports it right click and choose
"donate everything to Infinity".  That's quicker.)  Next, do a
>"select all" on the window that will come up on your screen
telling you it's time to pull down the storm windows.  Then you
>go to the newsgroup, and once in there click on
"download new porn binaries".  If you're missing any, just
>"Compose Message", and then paste what you have to
a piece of craft paper to make a nice porn collage.  Stare at
>the new form that is presented to you, and erase the
nipples.  This will infuriate your teenage sons.  Write a
>heading in the part that you just pasted in.  Then be sure
to hide it where the kids will find it, you pervert.  Make certain
>that the Subject line has exactly the title of the thread you
used to sew their names in their underwear, so you can be sure they
>are posting to in it, including the "Re:" :)
>>
>Because your post collapsed, I came along and read it
while standing in a big hole.  The construction foreman arrived
>and concluded the guy who wrote it must surely be very,
suave and debonair.  He pronounced it "De Boner".  He was
>very confused, what with all the random ">'s" everywhere,
he got mad and almost tore the blueprints, because of the broken
>and collapsed form.......and how do I know all this? It
was revealed in a dream.  Later I'll tell you about the therapy that
>happened to me one time.
>>
>Suzanne
>


** 
Captain Infinity
 ...I'm back, boys and girls


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