Subject: Re: It's snowin' and I'm feeling smug From: Infinity@world.std.com (Captain Infinity) Newsgroups: alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.recovery.na,alt.society.neutopia Date: Wed, 10 Mar 1999 Message-ID: <firstname.lastname@example.org> Once Upon A Time, In article <36E5DDDA.6CA8C1F6@netropolis.net> Sergey Bukhman wrote *some* of these things: >I only remember 3 times in my life where I was around snow. One is when I was trapped in one of those little globes. My family kept shaking me until I was >about 7 years old, back in the USSR (you don't know how lucky you are...) and then one day my sister dropped me, the globe shattered, I hit my head, and now >the only clear memory I have is getting my boots full of snow and playing with myself in the backyard. The neighbors got quite upset and threatened to sue >my father and brother. When I came home my mother was all fussy about us playing naked in the yard. But hey, she'd do it until she started moaning and >getting all wet. So where's the fairness, I ask you! Bah! Christmas is a bunk holiday! >The other two times are more recent. 96 and 97. 96 was when we went on our annual journey to Stonehenge to perform the ritual sacrifices. Then we took a >second trip to the States and stopped in Canada on the way. I remember that the "blue plate special" was always Baked Beaver, in every diner. Anyway, the >skiing was great fun, but my mother couldn't get the hang of it. We all stood around her, laughing, every time she fell. I don't know why she still >enjoyed that time, though. > >Third time was on my 11th grade class trip to Mt. Hermon, North Israel. I giggled at how small the mountain was. "Pee Wee Hermon" I called it. I >remember it all very clearly, and it was probably one of the best memories I have, now that the shock therapy sessions have erased the rest. That's all >I'll ever have, the types of which I'll be coming back to all my life, are the ones that the electricity missed. That single memory will keep me >chuckling and remembering "The good old times". Everyone had fun and we even played "bury Dad in the snow". Next year we plan to go dig him up. Unless we >had some snowfall. Actually, it was so strong that they closed the site for about an hour, so they could count the cash receipts. They made a million >earlier than expected. But we were all exhausted and satisfied, sitting at the station playing "I Spy". Mine was "I spy, with my little eye, a drunk at the >back of the bus talking, yelling, playing cards and having fun the way only he can. Feeling like a dead duck, spitting out pieces of his broken luck, as >11th graders on a school trip can. Oh! Oh! OHHHHHHHHH! AQUALUNG!!" They kicked me out of the car, then. Jerks! >Three experiences with snow. Each, on a different continent, in a different leotard, each a different shade of purple, to match my bruises. Each a new >country and a different environment. And I'll remember them all. THE END! ** Captain Infinity
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