Subject:    Re: Desperately Seeking Wonka
From:       Captain Infinity
Date:       Sat, 13 Oct 2001
Message-ID: <>

In the future, on an imaginary day which may or may not come to pass,
WWS wrote *some* of these things:

>On the way home I stopped at a local 7-11 to buy a lotto ticket (got to cover 

my eyes when the slutty salesgirl hands it to me.  She won't let me get to

>all the bases) and on the way out of the store I spot a skinny guy over by the

"No Public Urination" sign.  I put that up 'cuz drunks kept peeing into my

>dumpster. Looking carefully I saw the long gray beard, the unkempt

beard, the quivering beard...I tell ya, his 3 beards were a big part of his

>appearance, the furtive eyes... OMYGOD it's HIM. I yelled at him but as I

turned I was suddenly transported to Wonkaland!  Just then 30 Oompa Loompas

>advanced toward him he scuttled around the dumpster and disappeared into

the Educated Eggdicator.  He screamed all the way down.  It echoed into

>the night. 

I wonder if he landed on Veruca Salt?  I'll have to rappel down and check.

>The search starts tomorrow. 

Captain Infinity

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