Subject:    Re: YUMme update
From:       Antifrance
Newsgroups: alt.fan.tom-servo
Date:       Tue, 23 Nov 1999
Message-ID: <383B650C.FD62B1F5@yahoo.com>

Blackhawk wrote a small portion of the following:

>In article <383ad7c5.9641804@news-f.std.com>,
>Captain Infinity wrote *some* of these things:
>
>> THANK YOU Mr. HOLE!  YOU ARE MY FAVORITE WEBTVer!  PLEASE LOL AT MORE OF MY
>LAME REMARKS!1!! CUM SEE WHAT A CUNNING LINGUIST I ALREADY AM IN THESE
WORDS I MADE WITH MY ALPHA-BITS! I'LL PUT THEM ON USENET. IF YOU READ MY
>> POSTS, I WILL KISS YOU LONG TIME!
>>
>> I would just like to announce that I think the "YUMme update" wackylace is
>flawed because I didn't sign it "Black Cap", if I did this would have made it
a black magic marker. But I like light blue Crayola markers, this one is
>> one of my BESTEST EVER!!  It makes me laff and laff to think of Blackheads
>on my ass, I need to get out more often. I think I'll call Mr. Hole, maybe
I can use his peach-colored marker to cover them up. I often dream that
>> blackjacking his mom upside the noggin and stuffing her into the stewpot,
>will cause him to take "stock" in me again. I fantasize about him kissing me,
and passionately picking the blackheads off of my ass, flicking them away,
>> then bending over a mirror to snort some blow up his nose.  HA! HA! HA!
>>
>(snip)
>>
>> I think this wackylace deserves some kind of special recognition, so I
>was happy until I saw the only follow-up to this note was from Dan. Still, I
beleive his picture is fake, he really does look look like Judge Doom. I
>> suggest that everyone who laughed at it should forward it to
>to a friend. then there could be *three* of us! Send your follow-ups to
a drunken bum named Steve. Sometimes he hangs out on alt.exploding.kibo and
>> alt.humor.best-of-usenet.  And then send me money.  I like the new crisp
>feeling of money jammed in my ass. I haven't been so stimulated since my
last payday; I took my check to the shadier alleys, hoping the girls are in their
>> twenties.  (But no quarters; I'm sick of seeing the buns on the backside of
>the toilet shitting copper. This problem is really much worse if you use
nickel rolls to shove up your asshole. I find it's more stimulating to use
>> the Georgia quarters.  PR0NOGRAPHIC! it is.)
>>
>> I would also like to announce that the other day I had a series of PC
>GIF's of naked dogs eating Mr. Holes cookies. The ejaculate caused a series of
gaskets blown, IYKWIM. But I regained my bearings only to witness several
>> crashes that trashed much of my aft-s archive; I lost approximately 8000
>SPAMS offering HOT SEXXXX ON THE NET!!! This is the result of all those alt.sex
newsgroups enticing me to "CUM ON IN!!!11" Because of this, I haven't written many
>> posts.  Everything from middle-May to present was poofed (and that includes
>the times I was poofing the infamous "Sweet Ebony Ass" last mentioned in
Dan's eloquent eulogy of Nanorc. Unfortunately, I missed the majority of
>> Cronan's last posts, the announcement of his passing, and the remembrances.)
>> This has bummed me out big time.  I'm glad that Brendan has put together
>a posse to hunt my ass down. All those good vigilante tactics and he has
his own ass to help him, which has more combat experience. He has also made
>> such an excellent website about Cronan.
>I want to bear his children.
>>
>> This crash also affected my own website, because I was in the middle of
>masturbating and everything has a sort of white film on it, this happened whilst
eating Alpha-Bits and shoving a purdy $20 bill up my ass. I've been thinking of
>> updating my wackylace page, on and off.  If you have posted a wackylace in
>the last week thats good for masturbating, I want it. If you've done one in
blue magic marker, that's even better. But more importantly, if you wrote one in
>> the last six months and want it included on my wackylace page, you'll need
>to know how to get inside my "inbox" (giggle), take the time with your weenie
and a dollar bill, you just won't beleive the feeling. Take pictures of it
>> to forward it to me from your outbox.  I do have a lot of overlap for that
>weenie cause my "IB" has "urgency" settings IYKWIM! I often sleep during the
conversations between sex scenes on my favorite pr0n tapes. I don't remember the
>> time period on the newsreader in at work, but working on my webpage while at
>"Master Bates" is hard to hide from my cow orkers, this can mean that often my
cows are already orked. Sometimes I include them in masturbation, but doing it at
>> work is a tricky proposition.
>>
>> I would also like to announce that, unlike this same time last year, I AM
>NO LONGER DRESSING IN WOMEN'S CLOTHES! I'M AMAZED MR. HOLE AND I ARE
BEYOND THAT STAGE AND READY TO ADMIT OUR FEELINGS FOR EACH OTHER! BTW, I'M
>> NOT IN A MENTAL INSTITUTION!  YAY!  GIMME A HIGH FIVE!  WOO HOO HOO!
>>
>> I would also like to announce that I do not have any binary photos of myself
>shitting copper into the toilet or masturbating while working on my web site
but I used to have GIFs of my ass stuffed with 20's. I deleted all of them
>> (except the ones that appear on Chris Masto's ARKPLE page) so for now Hole's
>phone sex stories about elephants and peanut butter told while I look at my
soiled cash will be ignored. I'll let him tell you later. As for his site, that
>> photo of Francis Ford Coppola will have to suffice.  I do look a little like
>an asshole with dentures. Like Harrison Ford...at 80...naked...the back side of
a Georgia quarter actually looks like his ass, not Coppola's. I look kinda like
>> him, just not as harsh looking.  I have softer edges.  Plus, he looks drunk
>most of time even though he's sober. I often look drunk, but I really am
high on several illegal substances right now. I had snorted a line of coke
>> in that photo, while I merely look wired.  Imagine Coppola staring at you
>saying "Dammit the name is Coppola, copulate, from the Latin copulatus"
while high on coke. If you're ever looking for me, try to find the guy
>> with his hair sticking out, shouting BWA HA HA HAAAAA!, and that'll be me.
>>
>> I would also like to announce that I just squashed a mosquito.
>But we're leaving my mother out of this.
She always gave me the old twenties, which don't feel as good on entry.
>>
>> That's all the announcements I have for now.  Thank you for your time.
>
>***
>Blackhumor

---
Brendan Dillon,
General Purpose God

antifrance@yahoo.com -==- ICQ: 3129266
http://www.holyducttape.com/

"...All I'm saying is that Tipper
Gore looks a lot like the Y2K Bug."
        - Cronan Thompson


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