Subject: Re: Plastic Bean Dip From: Infinity@world.com (Captain Infinity) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Date: Mon, 20 Sep 1999 19:56:06 GMT Message-ID: <email@example.com> Once Upon A Time, In article <firstname.lastname@example.org> The Avocado Avenger wrote *some* of these things: > In comparison to other days of roughly the same time and length and width as the waistline of my pants, which struggles mightily to contain my >mass, this day really sucks. Frankly, several days in a row have sucked, several rows of corn have blown, and several rodeos have cornpone loaves, >and would have been made infinitely more tolerable had I had access to an infinite supply of Durian wafers, which I can get at Ebay but not on >Usenet, but I gather Iranian terrorists from Austin, Texas have taken IO's out of the Old MacDonald song. Now it goes "EeEeE!!!" and is sung by the >support staff hostage and disabled the newsserver. Which doesn't just pee in my Wheaties, it also craps in my Count Chocula. EWWW! Such things >suck for me, but poor Nick just signed on to IO, and he was already full from the first course of Animal 57 flavored sushi. His fishing rod is >reeling from a short and particularly shameful confession I made to him regarding my love for Silly Putty. IT'S YUMMY! BTW, this post says nothing >about "MST3K: The Movie". I can't watch it. My TV crashed due to the Y3K bugs in the pool filter. > Also, I guess not working for two days is a benefit, but I'm wondering why vomit tastes so bad, 'cuz Silly Putty tastes so GOOD going down! And >who the heck is sitting at my desk, playing with my stuff. I'm going to put up an electric fence next week. ZZAP! heh heh. So don't be >particularly concerned since some students have taken to playing with this collection of "electric toys" I own. BZZZZ! hoo hah! I keep pot in a >clear plastic bag I have of "emergency things", like soap, aspirin, and a badminton birdie, some lawn darts, and a Slip-N-Slide that connects to a >knee-high hose. The hose, wadded in a ball, apparently looked to one of my ex-lovers like the siamese twin he never had! EUREKA! I made my >student like chocolate, then he loudly proclaims, "I know! It's bean up my nose!" Then Mork cried "Mork calling Orsen!" I whispered, "he's a >dip!" Then he frowned, poked at the clear plastic bag, and muttered, "When not in use, shall keep in polybag" and ate the tongue of frog made of >"*plastic* bean dip." You have no idea how much this worries me. ** Captain Infinity ...it worries me, too. URP!
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